Omgoodness. If I could tell you the freedom I received allowing myself to stop seeing everything as a dress rehearsal for a performance I didn't know I was in, or studying for a test I knew nothing about. It's a little bit funny really, cause as I share this with you, I am reminded of so many dreams I've had where I'm all of a sudden put on stage to perform a show I never studied for. The thought of improvising may seem exciting to most people who have a background in theatre like I do, but boy... just fear.
I would stare at the audience, the people, the cast... I would make something up that always had everyone so mad at me. Like I should have known this work, or remembered this work, or at the very least... payed some form of attention to all the supposed rehearsals I never showed up to.
In this moment, I realize what my soul was telling me in these dreams. It wasn't pay more attention to your tasks. It's not anything like that at all, but simply an ask.
"Please just see it all as play and practice".
We have the honour to be humans experiencing this life the way we planned it before we even stepped foot on this plane. With that comes the allowance that we aren't and will never be a master or professional at being such. Humans live in choices, highs and lows, challenges and breaths, and with that imperfection. How beautiful to know we will never be perfect!
But be wary of making perfection a goal, as it is unattainable. I fall into this mindset too. "I'm gonna try to be perfect and judge myself harshly when I don't measure up so I can be a little closer to perfect". When I find myself in that space of judgement I remember that I have created a different space within myself to remind me... It's all a practice.
'Being' is a practice. 'Love' is a practice. 'Spirituality' is a practice. 'Habits' is a practice. Growing into you authentic soul expression is a practice.
I use to want to give up if I can't be perfect or amazing at something. Sure I know people say "You gotta practice and try again". I hated that before. Yet, something inside me changed when I realized how much judgement I carry on myself. I can't live my life waiting to damn myself every time I'm not "good" at something. What kind of life is that?
That's where grace the opposite of judgement comes in. Grace is allowing space for yourself to practice what you are learning. To fail, dust yourself off, check in with your soul, guides, and God, to allow yourself to keep moving. Trusting that the lessons you need to learn are there for you. They will integrate as they do in Divine timing. There is no rush to life. Simply practice.